My Two Worlds -- A Collision on Film (or at least an SD card)

I am a Texan. But live in Canada. My life...in pictures.
Originally uploaded by charmgirl13

Chris Kelly of CBCRadio3 snapped this photo in Austin this week during SXSW. If you are at all a follower of my wee little tiny slice of the blogosphere, you have probably read by now that I am a lover of photos, both taking and looking. I haven't seen a picture this cool in quite some time, though, and it is without a doubt my absolute new favourite.

The two loves of my life. Forever preserved on film. (swoon!)

They Call It Poutine

I tried poutine for the first time on Friday. Total and utter letdown. Granted, I had it at Swiss Chalet, the Canadian Boston Market equivalent, but still. This giant failure is analogous to someone ordering a taco at Taco Bell that doesn't taste remotely like an actual taco as Swiss Chalet is as much a Canadian institution as poutine. I'm usually into food porn, but the dish was so foul tasting that I couldn't even bring myself to take its photo. Also, because I was with my new boss.

What is poutine, you ask? Poutine is a French Canadian snack that, at its basic, is made with french fries (nom!), gravy and cheese curds. It's sort of like chili-cheese fries in the States, but not so much. The word means "mushy mess" in Acadian slang and was created in 1957 in Warwick, Québec. According to the people in the know, the french fries should be hand-cut and fried in pure lard, the gravy (also known as "BBQ chicken gravy") should be dark and thick like molasses, and the cheese curds (apparently the most important part of the dish) should be only fresh, white, cheddar cheese curds. A veritable heart attack waiting to happen, nón?

I've been to both Montréal and Québec City -- the epicenters of French Canadian cuisine -- but failed to try poutine in either city. I'm usually the über-tourist, trying every local thing I can get my hands (and mouth) on, but for whatever reason, I didn't try the gooey dish in either place. It just gives me a good reason to go back.

I have heard so much about poutine in my almost two years in Canada that I guess my expectations were too high. So far, though, I'm disappointed. Swiss Chalet poutine = Fail!

I love that people still use pay phones

Especially underground.

Old skool.

I'm Packing Up and Moving...Again

Moving can be cathartic. In my case, four moves in one month has added up to a Mt. Everest sized mountain of stress and zero catharsis. The only catharsis I have experienced lately has been six bags of clothes donated to Goodwill. In a span of 31 days, I will have moved house in Houston, moved house in Toronto, changed jobs and moved work locations, and for the cherry on top, moved my blog. Yep, that's right. I'm packing up and moving over to WordPress.com. I finally grew up, put on my big girl panties and moved to fancy schmancy new publisher. I even bought my own domain name (welcome to 2009!), although I'm not self-publishing at this point. I can't handle any more changes in the near future or I'll be in hospital, so stay tuned for that move at a (very) later date.

For now, though, meet me over at my new WordPress URL:

carmenmillet.wordpress.com

Update your RSS feeds, Goodle readers, pen and paper, stone tablets -- however you keep up with my antics -- and come see me at my new place!

Happy Demisemiseptcentennial, Toronto!

Photo courtesy of peo pea on Flickr, under Creative Commons license.

Why, Toronto, you don't look a day over 174...

On March 6, 2009, the fair city of Toronto marks its 175th birthday! I realize that in the grand scheme of things, that's not very old; some cities have been around for millenia. For North Amercia, though, 175 is pretty old!

When Toronto was incorporated as a city in 1834, there were fewer than 10,000 people living in the town of York-- mostly white and British -- and Queen Street was considered the city's northern boundary. Apparently, singing "Yankee Doodle Dandy" was a hangable offense in those days, too (my, how things haven't changed - grin). Today, there are 2.7 million citizens in Toronto proper and over six million people living in the Greater Toronto Area.

A quick reflection on this feat includes 175 years of growth and change: from the nickname "Muddy York", so named because of its unpaved, swampy streets; to "Toronto the Good" (my personal fave) named for the city's reputation as a stern Protestant outpost in a young country; to "Hogtown", "Hollywood North" (no, Vancouver, that isn't you), "T.O.", "T.dot" and after amalgamation, the "Megacity".

Toronto is now Canada's largest and most diverse city. Over 100 languages are spoken on the city streets. It is the economic engine of the country and one of the most environmentally conscious cities in the world. Of course, there's always room for improvement, i.e. a subway that actually goes somewhere, real automated banking machines, and more 24 hour restaurants, thank you very much. But overall, Toronto has a true grit and an undying spirit that makes it, I think, one of the best places on the planet.

And now, I give you 175 reasons to love Toronto, courtesy of the Toronto Star. I could likely come up with 175 more. Scratch that. I could likely come up with 1,075 more.

Happy Birthday, Toronto! I love you.

Also, please warm up.

For Once, A Proper *Rant* About Canada

As you all know, I have a major crush on Canada. I just couldn't love it any darn more. I am seriously considering chaining myself to the Canadian flag pole at the border on March 31, 2010. The RCMP's are going to have to push me across, I swear.

However. Because I am not a citizen or permanent resident of this fair country, I can't seem to get a credit card. I have been a homeowner for six years. I have had credit cards in my name since I was 16 years old (so, like, five years ago). Granted, in the States. The Canadian banks, however, consider me to have zero credit history and therefore, will not lend me any money. The banker I was dealing with actually told me that they don't lend to people who only have work permit status, because they "might just pick up and leave the country without paying their debts". Right. Because everyone can just pick up and LEAVE THEIR JOBS!

Look, I totally grok what they're saying, but at least check my US credit history. I have an income after all. Give me some kind of benefit of the doubt. Something.

Don't worry, Canada. We're just on a small break -- it's not permanent. And, I hope you know that despite this small setback, I still love you. It'll all get better...once you give me some damn credit!

Signed, Sealed, Delivered

Lucky for you guys, My Canadian Adventures will live on for another year. I officially leased out my condo in Houston today, so I (very happily) get to stay in T.O. - yahoo!

Canada, get ready for another 13 months of adventures with a Texas girl who has a giant crush on you (swoon)!

Houston Totally Rocked, Y'all

My Houston trip is quickly coming to an end and it was good to Your Humble Narrator. I haven't worn a coat in six days (!) and I think that maybe - just maybe - the pigment in my skin has officially changed from Casper white to the much darker hue of milky white.

My move went well and, despite running on a total of about four hours of sleep, I still managed to have an awesome time. Some highlights:

Driving into my fair city's downtown core

Widely available sweet tea - possibly the true love of my life

Seeing my friend B. - the only person who will make funny margarita faces with me.

Seeing my friend J. who despises taking pictures.

My nearly hassle-free move. This was day 2.5 with no shower. Pretty. Does anyone else think I look like I'm attempting to do the River Dance?

Scarfing down calorie-free (not!) mexican food, minus the refried beans. Ick.

Not nearly as bright a shade of white as when I left Canada.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggity Jig

I'm returning to the scene of the crime. I'm "fixin" to head back to Texas, y'all! You may have already heard, oh, once or twice by now, that I'm staying in Canada another year (!). I'm really only just slightly excited about it much (yippee, yahoo, woo hoo, wahoo, backflips, handstands, pogo sticks, bouncy balls, lollipops!!).

What spine-tingling fun will I be having in H-town, you ask? Check it: Mexican food! Margaritas with salt! Celebrating my parents' 41st wedding anniversary! Target run in a currency worth something! Breaking fingernails from packing up my condo! Shoving all my worldly goods into a 10x10 air conditioned box! Finding a renter in tanking economy! Wait a minute.....

(P.S. if anyone wants to come hang and help me pack, there's liquor in it for you. We might have to drink out of yellow Solo cups, but it's free. We can work our way from business drunk into lampshade-on-the-head drunk. Just be careful with my stuff.)

I'm getting my iTouch all charged up and ready to go with some tunage to get me through the week o'hell, er, I mean fun (sorry mom). I'm adding a snippet of the playlist that I'll be rockin' out to while enduring splinters from the eleventy-thousand cardboard boxes I'll be packing. Thanks to a pretty fantastic Canadian radio fan I know, I've been listening almost exclusively to CBCRadio3 lately (except in my car where I am still (Sirius)XM loyal, but quickly losing patience. Come ON - Huey Lewis has no place on the 80's channel. Or any channel for that matter). CBCRadio3 is a nationally broadcast Canadian radio station that rocks all Canadian music by all Canadian artists all the time. Rock, pop, hip hop, alternative, electronic - if you like it, they're playing it. The best part? Their streaming is gratis. I think it's quite possibly the world's greatest radio station. People - stop listening to Britney, Taylor Swift and flippin' Uncle Kracker and do yourselves a favour - check out some good music.

A'hem...without further ado, my playlist, set to the tune of "Smack My B*tch Up" but entitled "Pack Yo Sh*t Up".

1) Help, I'm Alive - Metric (I am so digging this song right now, I can hardly stand it. Get the acoustic version free on their website)
2) Some Are Lakes - Land of Talk
3) The Reptiles and I - Shriekback
4) Hands on Fire - The Stills
5) Land of Giants - Hooded Fang
6) Sonnet - The Verve (this song makes me happy like a schoolgirl getting felt up under the bleachers)
7) Mr. Wendall - Arrested Development
8) By Your Side (Naked Music Remix) - Sade ft. Miguel Migs
9) We Are the Hunters - The D'urbervilles
10) Everything Counts - Depeche Mode
11) 14 Forever - Stars
12) Rushing - Moby
13) Ebow the Letter - R.E.M.
14) Until the Night is Over - Timber Timbre
15) 100 Days, 100 Nights - Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings
16) Queen of Hearts - Juice Newton (aw yeah! Flashback!)
17) Love Will Tear Us Apart - Joy Division
18) Never Let Me Down Again - Depeche Mode
19) Where Do I Begin - The Chemical Brothers
Tie for 20th place:
20a) Jesus on the Radio - Guster
20b) Closedown - The Cure

Talk to you guys next week. Big Texas-sized hugs!

Side note: total shout out to Continental Airlines. I was scheduled to fly through Newark to Houston on the same type of prop plane that, very sadly, went down in Buffalo last week. And, there is supposed to be a rain/snow mix the day I leave. Ugh. I'm not usually a flying wimp, but I was having serious heart palpitations about getting on that plane. I called Continental and asked if there was anything they could do because, honestly, I would have been totally devoid of my sangfroid had I been required to fly on that plane in the snow (I know, I know...I live in Canada.). To my surprise and delight, they were more than accommodating and to boot, super cool about it. They changed my flights to non-stop jet service without - shock of the century - ANY ADDITIONAL FARE CHARGES OR CHANGE FEES. Continental: thank you, thank you, thank you. You guys rock. This is why I love you so.

The truth is, Canada, America isn't into you.

As an American living in Canada, I can certainly relate to this article although reading it was a definite palm-to-forehead moment for me.

Reposted from the February 16, 2009 online edition of the Toronto Star. By Eric Weiner.

The truth is, Canada, America isn't into you.

It's not personal but niceness doesn't cut it in the land of the free and home of the brave.

A big ol' howdy and bonjour Canada! How are you?

We know, we know, it's been a while. Sorry about that.

We have been, per usual, rather self-absorbed lately, what with our historic elections and our economy in freefall. But, hey, good news. Did you hear? We're coming to visit. We'll be in Ottawa on the 19th. Hope you can make it. We hear mid-February is a lovely time of year there.

Look, Canada, before you get your hopes up about this trip, there's something we need to tell you. We're not sure how to put this so we will be brutally direct, as is our way. We're just not that into you.

There, we said it. We feel better already.

You've always been there for us, Canada: after the Sept. 11 attacks and now in Afghanistan. We appreciate that, really we do. But still, we're just not that into you.

It's not personal, really. It's geopolitical. You're just too ... nice. Nice doesn't get our attention. Threatening gets our attention, and you, Canada, are anything but threatening, except on the hockey rink, of course, but we don't take hockey all that seriously.

If you really wanted us to notice, you should have gotten all gussied up in that Taepodong outfit (it worked for North Korea) or maybe flashed some weapons of mass destruction – real or imagined, it's all the same to us.

Let's face it. We've been bickering a lot lately – over Afghanistan and NAFTA and that silly softwood dispute. Plus you think we hog all the water, which we probably do.

We admit we've been avoiding you lately. But can you blame us? Your loonie is loony. Up one day, down the next, then up again. We've got plenty of that yo-yo action right here on Wall Street. We don't need to go north for it.

Also, many of us Americans – especially those in their 20s and 30s – tell surveyors they find Canada a "boring" place to visit.

I know, I know, how can a country with both Cirque du Soleil and Don Cherry possibly be described as boring? What can I say, Canada? Our amusement threshold is very high.

So is our capacity for selfishness. Our pending "Buy American" campaign hurts you. We feel your pain, Canada, really we do, but we've got to look out for Number 1. And we all know who Number 1 is.

Perhaps what we have here is a classic failure to communicate. The fact is, we don't know you Canada. And no wonder: American newspapers no longer maintain bureaus in Canada.

Not that we paid much attention when they did. Most of us couldn't name your prime minister or, for that matter, your capital city. Is this kind of ignorance any basis for a relationship?

If we know you Canada (and we've already determined we don't) you're probably blaming yourself. You always do. Unlike us, you're so modest and self-effacing. It's endearing.

Remember that joke you like to tell us? How do you get 50 Canadians to leave a swimming pool? By making an announcement: Will all the Canadians please leave the pool. See, you find that funny. We don't get it. That's why, Canada, it's best we go our separate ways.

I know what you're thinking: You can change, America. You've elected a new president, one who is all about change and re-engagement with the world.

Don't believe it, Canada. Nations, like people, don't change easily. We're been around for more than 200 years. We're a bit stuck in our ways.

No, Canada, we're just not that into you and probably never will be. Don't fret, though. You're better off without us. We were very much into Iraq (still are) and look how that turned out.

Besides, Canada, you're too good for us anyway.

The truth is we envy you, though of course we never admit that to anyone, not even ourselves. We envy your health-care system. We envy your prudent, sober banks. We envy your restraint on the international stage. We envy your very happiness. We envy everything about you. Except your weather, of course. Nobody envies that.

So, chin up. We can still be friends. After all, you are so close; we're practically neighbours.

Yes, we're still friends – and best trading partners for life too! And you will continue to send us your best comedians, won't you?

Hey, let's do coffee sometime. We'll call you.

Eric Weiner is the Washington-based author of The Geography of Bliss: One Grump's Search for the Happiest Places in the World, now out in paperback.

Just Call Me Annie. Annie Liebowitz.

When I was just a wee tyke, my parents gave me a pink - yes, pink - Le Clic camera. Did that just take you wayback? You remember the ones - they were those disc-shaped cameras from the 80's and came in cool colours like pink, purple, red and blue. (I tried finding an image online but, strangely, couldn't) The minute I opened that camera, I thought I was the coolest thing, well, evah. I really haven't stopped taking pictures since. Just ask my friends who I annoy endlessly with my photos of all things, including the mundane. It's all for the blog, friends, all for the blog.

Fast forward 25 years to December 2K8. I was in Houston for the holidays and went to a TV commercial shoot my company was doing with the Houston Rockets, specifically with Shane Battier and Carl Landry. Of course, I brought along my camera and as it turns out, was the only person there to think of doing so. I know - don't ask me. I usually don't put my photos "out there", mostly for fear of being judged. I just choose not to look like a complete ass in front of everyone on earth (just a select few). Post holidays, though, I was asked to provide some of my snaps to our PR department to accompany the contest press release. So I did.

Turns out that something way cool happened. One of the wires picked up the story and -- wait for it -- my photo was featured on the Reuters board in both Times Square and Las Vegas! Freakin' sweet.

Reuters Board in Times Square

PR Newswire in Las Vegas

The Original

Shane Battier and me

It's not really that great of a photo, imo. Still, it had eyeballs gawking at it in two of the hippest cities on the planet. I expect to get a call from National Geographic any day now because, clearly, my time has come. Don't worry -- I promise not to forget the little people (grin). And just think...it all started with a pink Le Clic.

Happy Valentine's Day, My Loves!

I'm exhausted. Thank God it's a long weekend. Monday is Family Day in Ontario and as the name implies, essentially negates the existence of about 33% of the population. I'm not complaining, though...it's a day off.

I have a date tonight. Kudos to him for scheduling well in advance but conveniently not on Saturday night. That's a good thing, really - I don't know how many "ring hidden in pastry" situations I can take. I'd rather just avoid the restaurant scene tomorrow altogether. True story: I was at the dry cleaner today and the lady working said to me "oh, you must be very busy tomorrow". I had to stop and think for a second. Was there a big festival I didn't know about? Did I win the Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes and they're bringing over the giant cheque and balloons? You can usually tell what I'm thinking by the expression on my face and I must have looked really confused because she proceeded to inform me "It's Valentine's Day - you must be very busy". Sigh. Even my dry cleaner is banking on me to have a date tomorrow, when, really, I'll just be at home in my pajamas. Oh well. At least someone thinks I'm cool. Life is 90% perception anyway, right?

We got fancy new copy machines at work and our Facilities team has scheduled training sessions for them next week. Training sessions on using the copy machines. And at an hour each, no less. I will be attending simply for the comedic value. This is something I have to see. "No, no...you push this button here - the one that says 'Copy'".

Sincere apologies for the watching-paint-dry-on-the-wall-boring posts as of late. I promise to try harder! Note to self: be wittier by half.

All The Cool Kids Are Doing It

What is everyone's deal with the memes all of a sudden? The zeitgeist of 2009, no doubt. I've seen '25 Random Things' memes, 'Bucket' list memes, 'Who I Cheated On My Wife With" memes...too many damn memes! I have thus far refused to succumb, because do you really care to know what kind of fruit I like? Sheesh - I write a blog for God sakes! It's chock full o' totally random things about me. But, since my friends continue to harass me about not filling these things out, I'll give in. Does this mean you're going to send me some of my favorite things now? Hmpf - thought so. Find below my own "Meme" of things that make me happy. Now stop bugging me!

My passport
Witty repartee
TCM Channel's "31 Days of Oscar"
Perfume/girlie potions - It's simple...I'm addicted.
The Sunday Times
Traveling to far off places
My Art Gallery of Ontario membership card
Christmas lights year round
Mexican food
Frozen Margaritas with salt
Machu Picchu
Red Mini Coopers
4" heels
(Sirius)XM radio
White high threadcount sheets
This American Life/Ira Glass/NPR/All Things Considered
David Sedaris - met him in T.O....raunchy and hilarious.
Gin & Tonic with a twist - year round cocktail
Pimm's Cup - summer patio cocktail
The Albright-Knox Gallery - Buffalo, New York
In-town hotel stays - Hotel ZaZa (Houston), Four Seasons (Toronto)
Red wine
Great conversation
My Paella pan
Mascara
Friday nights
Laughing uncontrollably
Candles - I actually have a candle closet at my house. I know...Dork.
My iTouch, natch
Boardgames - Cranium, Taboo, Blokus, 80's Trivial Pursuit
Golf carts
Absolutely anything with chocolate
Timepieces
All things Canadian (except the taxes)

I'm done. Hope your day has now been made (grin).

Soundtrack for Today

It's a gorgeous, sunny day today and I'm venturing out to take some photos. Thought I'd list my soundtrack for the day. Sing along with me!

1) This Must Be the Place - Talking Heads
2) Miles Away (Johnny Vicious Club Mix) - Madonna
3) Gold Digger - Kanye West
4) Feel Good - Gorillaz
5) The Drugs Don't Work - The Verve
6) World in Motion - New Order
7) Iris - Live
8) Poker Face (Jody den Broder Remix) - Lady Gaga
9) Hypnotize - Notorious BIG
10) Good Life - Kanye West
11) Baby Jane - Rod Stewart
12) We Both Reached for the Gun - 1996 "Chicago" Soundtrack
12) Staring at the Sun - TV on the Radio
13) Hey Ya - Outkast
14) (Feel Me) Through the Radio (Inpetto Remix Edit) - DJ Shog

Head Too Cloudy to Think of Anything Clever

My friends and I went out last night and, needless to say, debauchery ensued. Brant House is the spot in T.O. for $3 drinks so it's all their fault, really.

The pounding in my noggin is relentless. I tried sleeping off the inevitable hangover but my growling G.I. tract forced me to immediately cram greasy foods down my throat. Nap time will be a requirement today, natch.

I'm certainly old enough to know better...but it's still fun anyway.

See more photos here.

Backspin, Yo

I fancy a lovely little channel on (Sirius)XM called "Backspin-XL". It's total old skool rap and basically kicks it - hard. It's so old skool, in fact, that seniors and their very senior parents listen while nursing their Manhattans at the bar.

I heard one of my all-time faves this morning and was forced to share. Totally took me back to when I was, like, eight. Okay, twelve, but who's counting. Fantastic little tune to kick off the weekend, imo, as I'll be kickin' it tonight on King West. I'll personally be having a drink or two. Or ten.

So, do you remember this little ditty? I love that it's the Soul Train version, too. I mean, who doesn't have fond memories of running home from school, sweaty with scabby knees and a metal Smurfs lunchbox clanging in hand, to watch Don Cornelius and "the hippest trip in America"? Good times.

(note the retro charm of Doug E Fresh's "Coca-Cola" shirt. for shame!)

One of These Things Doesn't Belong

Any guesses?

Snapped near College and Ossington.

Side note: President Obama, will you consider nominating me to your Cabinet? I've paid all my taxes.

Well, You Start By Tearing Up a Wad of Cash...

It snowed in Toronto this morning. Unbeknownst to me, of course, until after I'd woken up. I was formerly an avid Canadian weather watcher but when I realized that they were wrong 90% of the time, I quit watching. The old adage heard in cities 'round the world - "just wait 15 minutes and the weather will change" - is certainly true of this fair city as well. I don't really do snow, at least when it comes to driving, and because I didn't know I'd have to deal with the little white bugs today, I got up too late to take transit. I called a colleague who lives in my building, but he had an early morning meeting. Reality was staring me square in the face: I was going to have to drive. Sometimes, you just have to put on your big girl panties and work it out.

Here's the fun part. In my haste and nervousness about the possibility of sliding off the Gardiner or, say, running down a pedestrian, I clipped a concrete post in my parking garage. I heard the loud "bang" and knew exactly what I'd done. I tried to maintain my equanimity, but uttered an expletive anyway (that can't be repeated here because my Mom's reading). So it goes. I could not even bring myself to stop and look at the gash, so I just kept driving - straight to work. Problem-free, I might add.

My beloved (and nearly paid for) car has not been washed in over three months and is therefore covered in a two-inch thick crust of dirt, snow and ice. Actually, I can hardly change lanes on the freeway because I can barely see out. I usually try to take the "glass half full" approach in life and in this scenario it's as follows: the lovely crust mix has mitigated my ability to see the scrape. For now. Once I wash it, though, the ugly scab on my heretofore perfect vehicle will be completely exposed for all the world to see. Namely me. Oh well, such is life.

Thank You Jesus!!

Five words: the sun came out today!!

My makeup was ruined from the watery eyes I had after staring at the sun for about ten straight minutes, but I didn't care! Then, I sang at the top of my lungs right in the middle of the office and got the stink-eye from my colleagues, but I didn't care! The sun was blisteringly bright coming around the Don Mills curve on the DVP and my poor cornea were hardly able to adjust to the strong UV light; I was almost in a 179 car pile up because of it, but I didn't care! I'm from Texas, remember? I'm used to living on the face of the sun, so not seeing it for five months has done permanent damage to both my eyeballs and my epidermis (that, I care about).

Today, though, I'm a happy girl!

Sunshine!

Me doing a little jig after seeing the sun

Happy girl! (photo courtesy of Catherine)

The Gardiner on my way home - woo hoo!

My Week of Not Being Lame

My weeks are usually manic-filled episodes of sprinting around Toronto from place to place. Sort of like the proverbial chicken. Last week, though, was a rare one where I didn't have much to do. I still managed to find a little bit of trouble - as I'm apt to do - but it was basically a slow one for me. This week, however, I am back on my A-game and have a ton of cool things lined up. If anyone wants to join, call me (picture me mouthing the words and holding up a "finger phone" to my ear).

Monday - Watching The Bachelor, sillies. Well, and hip hop dance class at City Dance Corps, too, but I'll be DVR'ing the former. I mean, who doesn't wanna watch Jason take those crazy, greedy, plastic bitches home to meet mom and dad?! It's a (made for TV) disaster waiting to happen and I can't wait.

Tuesday: Sewing Machine Essentials class. Yep, I'm diving head first into the pool of domestication. I will be learning how to turn a sewing machine on for the very first time and will be attempting to turn fabric into a pillow slip. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a true city girl at heart so this should be interesting. If I had to sew a button to save my life, well, you know.

Pics to follow, natch.

Wednesday: Watch Kobe (and the rest of the Lakers) take down the Raptors.

Thursday: "Up Until Now" at the Winchester Street Theatre (aka "The Winch"). The world premiere of a newly commissioned work from the iconic American choreographer and dance experimentalist Deborah Hay. Should be rockin'.

Friday: King West Pub Crawl. If it's anywhere near as debaucherous as December's outing, I'll just plan to talk to you guys next week. Should be fun to try and make my 9am flight to Houston on Saturday. Think I'll make it? (@Farhan - bet you can't get 16 G&T's down this time without stumbling home)

Saturday: Wake up and take aspirin. Fly to Houston. Pack up condo. Try to find renter in tanking economy. Shove as much Mexican food as possible down throat. Get waited on hand and foot by amazing parents.

My Kinda Place

I tried a new church yesterday. I'm, unfortunately, a lapsed Catholic and yes, I feel guilty about it. I promise to say 10 Our Father's and 10 Hail Mary's as penance. Tomorrow.

I'm a girl who appreciates rituals, both religious and otherwise. Rituals have been ingrained in me since I was a small girl, likely from attending weekly Mass with devout parents very involved with the Church. To this day they're a comfort to me. When deciding which university to attend, I ended up choosing one steeped in tradition and rituals. Probably not a coincidence considering I had several to choose from. Don't get me wrong, I despise redundancy; but having the same routine day after day is a far cry from the deeper ritualistic experience I crave.

There aren't many churches around me since I live downtown, so I tried St. Andrew's Presbyterian, a 179 year-old church about a ten minute walk from my building. As I walked up to the church, I got that familiar little adrenaline rush knowing that I was walking into a completely new situation (and which I secretly love!). I found a seat, the service began and everything was fine - no one brought out the whips to lash me for not being "one of them" nor did anyone point and laugh. Maybe the Protestants aren't that bad after all (kidding!).

Blah, blah, blah, we asked for forgiveness, etc, etc and the sermon began. The first three words out of the reverend's mouth were "Money. Sex. Demonic Possession.", and I knew I was home.

The Do-Gooders Society (and damn proud of it)

I joined the Junior League of Toronto. I was a provisional member in the Houston Junior League, but when I was transferred to T.O., I was forced to resign. Finally, after 18 months of contract extensions, waiting to find out if my work visa was going to be extended or if I was going to be personally escorted to the Canadian/US border, I decided to jump in feet first and just join already.

For those of you unfamiliar with the Junior League, it's basically a hoity-toity group of women who disguise their social climbing behind a mask of "volunteerism". It's essentially where former sorority girls go to die. At least in Houston it is. Just to give some perspective, the Toronto League currently has 88 active members not including the 15 who started today. The Houston League currently has 5,000 active members. You do the math. The Toronto League, unlike the Houston League, though, actually attempts to give back to the community (ok, not totally true, but sort of). It doesn't care if you're black, white, brown, big, small, young or old...it just cares that you care. And I care.

Needless to say, I'm excited and am blowing my own little horn about the possibilities that our "little engine" just might achieve. Blaaaaaat!

My friend Christina and I waiting for the subway post-JLT meeting

Real Tea vs Canadian Tea

I had a brief conversation with someone this week about proper iced tea. Of course, he was Canadian and therefore hardly aware of any other tea besides this kind. Granted, he has tried iced tea from McDonald's and, while that doesn't really count in my book as true iced tea, at least it's actually brewed! I am in no way trying to take anything away from Nestea - it is a perfectly reputable brand - but any alleged tea maker who has the word "Instant" on their homepage is in no way the real thing.

So, being a true Southern girl with a keen opinion on the libation, I thought I'd take this opportunity to do a little comparison for all of you tea lovers out there.

How real sweet tea is made:
1) Boil a large pot of water
2) Steep actual tea bags for 5-7 minutes
3) Remove tea bags
4) Add 1 cup of sugar while tea is still hot; stir until sugar is dissolved (note: sugar does not dissolve in cold beverages)
5) Add enough water to fill up half of your container
6) Add mint leaves, fresh lemon wedges or any other fresh additive of your choice
7) Stir
8) Pour over ice and enjoy!

How Canadian tea is made:
1) Mix up all kinds of chemicals and ingredients that end in things like "-dioxide", "-zonate", "-lactin", etc.
2) Shoot in artificial lemon juice
3) Add some dark food coloring to make beverage appear to be "actual" tea
4) Add processed air to keep bottle content "fresh"
5) Add screw top to keep preservatives in
6) Pour over ice and enjoy!

You can choose for yourself, of course...I'm just sayin'.

Things I Did This Weekend

1) Completed my required prescription drugs. - You know how you get three trees' worth of paper warnings and side effects with your Rx? Well those nasty side effect don't usually apply to me and I rarely suffer from them. Until today. The evil pharmacist warned me that one of my prescriptions often causes a metal taste in your mouth. After three days - nothing. This morning, I woke up tasting so much metal in my mouth that I thought I might have sleepwalked my ass over to the Ritz Carlton being built on Wellington Street and gnawed my way through every single I-beam there. Even after being completely ridiculed for wearing braces not once, but twice, in my life (two years both times!), I have still never tasted this much metal in my mouth.

* If anyone knows how to rid my trap of this miserable chemical element taste, an email would be much appreciated.

2) Froze my ass off and woke up to shrill, grinding noise. - It's still snowing outside. I am going to have to dig my way outta here today and am none too happy about it. The first 27 times it snowed, I was completely enamored. Now? It could never snow again and I'd be a happy girl. Actually, snow is quite beautiful when it's falling and seems to silence the city in a way that it's not normally. However - if I go to sleep when snow's falling, I know I will in no way be getting a full night's sleep. This is because of the oft dreaded snow plough. Inevitably, at 3 or 4am, I am jolted awake by a noise not all that different than nails on a chalkboard. My window faces an NFL football-field-sized parking lot, so I get to hear the grinding of metal against concrete for no fewer than two hours every time it snows. So it goes. This morning, I had the pleasure of hearing him at 4:30am.

Look, I totally grok that he has to clear the snow. But is it really a requirement that it happen before the crack o'dawn? I mean, it's Sunday for Christ sake. The usually packed parking lot will nary be used today...well, at least not until after Noon. Honestly, my complaint isn't that the man is doing his job. It's simply the hour.

Please, Mr. Snow Clearing Man - get some sleep so I can too!

3) Passed this house. - Yes - those are actual plush toys glued and wrapped around this house on Bertmount Street in Leslieville. Apparently, they even change the toys out seasonally. Wow.

4) Ruined a perfectly good cheese grits casserole.

5) Did my very own science experiment. - As my blog name suggests, I am from Texas. This means that, until I moved to Canada, I had never experienced the extreme winter weather which I now get to grin and bear. It's been unusually cold over the past week (I know - that horse has been beaten) so I decided to see if water really would freeze solid if left outside on my balcony in -20C temps. Last night, I put out about 4 cups of water in a plastic jug and in a few minutes, after I peel myself out of bed and wrap my head eight times, I'll check the results.

Author's note: I finally made it outside and - brace yourself - total success! Frozen solid. Is anyone surprised? Nah, me either.

Next up for me: Nobel Prize for Science.

Saturday, January 17, 2009 8:30pm

Sunday, January 18, 2009 1:30pm

Paxil, please

It's official - I have the winter blues. This is evidenced by my uncontrollable alligator tears and lack of energy to do anything, including leaving my apartment. In an effort to process, I've determined this momentary show of emotion could potentially be due to a few things:

1) I started suffering from an acute sinus infection last Saturday, was officially diagnosed on Wednesday and have been taking 3 different brick-sized pills a day since then. I have essentially been in a drug-induced haze for 3 days. Yes, clouds have filled my head and I can hardly think.

2) Toronto is in the middle of a weeklong arctic blast. My cracked, ashen flesh is showing serious signs of cellular degeneration. Today, I triple-wrapped myself in North Face, gave myself an impromptu latte-steam facial and almost sawed off my gangrene-plauged limbs in desperation. Combine the sinus infection with the face blistering extreme temps and you have a recipe for disaster. I have not ventured outside in 3 days. Now I see why Jack Nicholson went nuts in "The Shining". My mouth was so dry when I woke up this morning, despite my industrial-strength humidifier, that it felt like someone had shoved in 87 bales of cotton. I could hardly swallow and had to moisten up my hole with a Catholic-family sized gallon of water. Even the birds are looking for a warm place to park their feathers (see photo below).

Please God - make it stop.

Proof of the cold (it's on TV, so it must be true)

The poor birds

The frozen wasteland

Me trying to stay warm (note the red, chapped visage)

Time to Take Your Laptops Off "Simmer"

Hi folks,
You may have noticed that I've been on a self-imposed hiatus and haven't posted anything in a while. Well, fret no more - I'm here to apologize and make nice. I've actually been super busy collecting experiences to write about...I just haven't actually taken the time to write them down! For those of you still with me, I have two spankin' new posts for your perusal. Enjoy!

For those of you who have been in hibernation with me, Welcome Back!

Tobogganing!

I went tobogganing today for the first time in my life. I guess the saying "better late than never" is apt in this scenario. My friend Chris and his wife invited me to their home for an early breakfast (homemade pancakes! smoothies!) - the perfect breakfast for a very chilly day. It was -20C when I left my house this morning. Not quite the balmy day. As an aside, I really enjoy T.O. on Sunday mornings. The city is quiet and I feel like I can explore without being in my usual iPod-wearing bubble, trying to drown out the constant whirs and whines of a big city.

Chris, his little girl and I made it out to the Winthrow Park "baby hill" around 10:30am. While the hill is considered small by T.O. standards, I was more than a little nervous once I climbed to the top of the hill. Even though there were 4 years olds flying down the hill like Canadian geese in flight south for winter, I had nervous little butterflies in my tummy! Chris and his daughter went down first as I got my "feet wet" and nerves up. Up next - the Texan - and in my best Texas accent asked "now how do I do this exactly?" The stares from the regulars were intense! The three of us went down together and it was exactly what I'd hoped it would be - super fun! Because the snow was fluffy and powdery, we all got face fulls of snow on the way down. Chris's daughter was none too happy about it and thus ended her trips down the hill. I, however, was like a kid in a candy store and went down a few more times on my own. I even caught air on a big bump! Sweet. We made snow angels and threw snowballs, and then packed it in and headed home.

Later that same day, I got ready to go to the annual Toronto Maple Leafs "Have a Heart" dinner. The Leafs players serve the attendees at different stations around the venue - in this case, the Boiler House at the Distillery District - and raise money for their Leafs 4 Kids charity. My friend Carolyn came with me and had a drink at Pure Spirits beforehand (note to self: must try this place again soon - good vibe and what smelled like good food).

Afterwards, we headed over to the Boiler House and were conveniently too late to purcahse a "mystery bag", although we later found out that they were basically selling old and outdated TML merch. Bogus! We had dinner after introductions served to us by all the Leafs VIP's - Coach, GM, and players. Overall, it was a way cool event complete with a TML BBQ set and Players cookbook as the party swag...sweet!

Me with Tomas Kaberle

Can Someone Please Close the Freezer Door?

It's -28C outside today. Granted, that's with the windchill, but does it really matter whether it's -19C legitimately or -28C with the wind? I think not. T.O. has become a snow-choked frozen wasteland unfit for man or vehicle. Note to self: buy long johns and a timeshare in Antigua.

Looking out my window - at 2pm

Read more about the freezer that has become Toronto here.

But I digress. I am under the weather, diagnosed by my doc-in-a-box as having an "acute sinus infection" and not "walking pneumonia" as I had concluded by surfing mayoclinic.com. I am supposed to be resting and not working but, alas, work must go on and I am doing my best to keep up with the plethora of quasi-unimportant emails (imo!). Basically, I've been slathering myself up with my newly purchased jar of Vaseline (does that turn anyone else on besides me?), trying to keep my ever-reddening nose somewhat puppy-dog moist, sucking down Halls mentholatum and wrapping myself in a warm blanket cocoon. Maybe I should get one of these monk-like garbs?

I'm not used to sitting at home all day and around 4pm today, I started to get a serious case of cabin fever. I was also starting to feel achy and since am living here alone, must self-medicate and self-serve; as such, I ventured outside to Shoppers Drug Mart to buy a thermometer so as to properly monitor my (again self-diagnosed) oncoming fever. As soon as I stepped outside, the cold took my breath away. It was *bitterly* cold. When I breathed in, my nose actually froze together. Froze *together*, people! It felt like someone opened the freezer door and amped it up x 100. As a born and raised Southern girl, I was ill prepared for it. Still, I perservered and trudged up to the drugstore. The city seemed oddly quiet and I don't know if that's because it was so bloody cold outside that people were smartly staying indoors or because I had on about 8 layers of scarves, earmufs and hats wrapped around my already inflamed head. I perused the aisles, picked up the necessary "sick people foods" (Chicken noodle soup! Saltines! Catholic family-sized jug of Tropicana!), a $14.49 digital thermometer and headed home. I force fed the soup, fresh fruit and OJ and continued enjoying my overly humidified apartment while blissfully watching the all-day CSI marathon on Spike TV. Can life can't get any better?

*New Feature Alert*
So, I am attempting to add a new bit to my blog whereby I document some of the current music I'm digging. Will do my best to post as many Canadian artists as possible in homage to my adopted country. Without further ado.....

Currently listening to (artist/song title):

Hooded Fang/Land of Giants
PPP/Lovers and Haters
Invasions/Atalantic Boulevard
Oh No Forest Fires/It's Not Fun and Games Until Someone Loses
Hooded Fang/Fall Leaves